Peer Coaching and Self-Coaching

Glass orb icon reflecting the self-coaching model

The self-coaching approach combines two powerful coaching models into a comprehensive process for self-development.

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Coaching is an immensely effective mechanism for self-development. ‘Self-development’ in this case refers to where ownership for the development lies. To be fully effective, the appointment of a coach does not confer responsibility for development to the coach. Their role is to assist the person being coached to gain a better understanding of how to improve themselves. To do this, coaches use a process of some kind.
Coaches can be colleagues, peers, friends, mentors, professional coaches. Alternatively, they can be a subordinate (upward coaching), a boss (empowerment coaching) or the person being coached (self-coaching).
The self-coaching model is designed to support people to coach themselves. However, it can be even more powerful if used with a separate trusted coach. It is based on the idea that all development involves both an inner and an outer journey.

The outer journey of development

Picture of self-coaching model - outer journeyIn the Outer Journey, we set ourselves challenges related to our standing in the world around us. These might relate to things we want to achieve, or outcomes we want to bring about, that we do not find easy, and where we recognise that their attainment will require us to learn and develop new skills and understanding,
Sir John Whitmore’s Grow model provides a helpful and proven basis for mapping the steps of this journey:
  • It starts with gaining clarity over the Goal itself.
  • And then clarifying the gap between that goal and our current Reality.
  • Having understood the gap, we evaluate our Options to close it.
  • And then make a determination of which of those options we Will pursue.
The outer journey represents a cycle, leading us to set new goals as we attain previous ones, or to reconsider our reality as we re-affirm (or adjust) our old goals and make progress toward them.

The inner journey of development

Picture of self-coaching model - inner journeyHowever, opportunities for real growth and development occur when we find ourselves stuck on our outer journey. This may be as a result of weaknesses or obstacles within ourselves. When we then identify and address those barriers, it allows us to move on. Additionally, it brings about a more profound change in ourselves which addresses deeper more sustainable competences.
This is the Inner Journey which is inspired by Nicole Eifler’s 4-Box model:
  • In this, we recognise our own Habits and behaviours which hold us back from our goals and keep us in our current reality.
  • This provides the opportunity for new Insights into why we hold onto these habits and limit our options.
  • Which highlight the extent to which we hold ourselves back by the stories we tell ourselves. We can use this insight to work on changing our Narrative; to develop more helpful stories about ourselves, our situation and our potential. These stories then drive our Will and our resolve.
  • And these enable us to Enact a revised version of ourselves rooted in truths which empower and excite us. And which enable us to change our habits and reach our goals.

In this way, moving into the inner journey provides new energy and insight into the various steps of the outer journey.

Self-coaching or coach selection

Picture of integrated self-coaching modelOur outer journey is the one that the people around us will see, and which will lead to tangible benefits. However, it is the inner journey, and its intangible blessings, that really marks our growth and our potential.
As I have said, people can use the model to self-coach, but this can be even more powerful between an individual and an independent coach. But who should people select as such a coach?
The first requirement is that it should be someone sufficiently skilled to ensure the person receiving coaching retains ownership. Ownership is vital to progress. Good questions can help build that ownership, while suggestions can easily (and subtly) undermine it.
The second requirement concerns the level of trust built between the coach and the individual. It should be noted that exposing our inner journey makes us vulnerable. The deeper we go, the more vulnerable it makes us, and much of what holds us back can go pretty deep.
Therefore, in a coaching partnership, this model will only be fully effective with a coach you can really trust. Because if there is any doubt, there will be a tendency to skirt over things and stay close to the surface.

Using the self-coaching template

Picture of self-coaching templateWe have built a free working template of this model via this link: https://app.conceptboard.com/load/37/?=Coaching_Template
To use the model, we propose you begin by including your own thoughts on your current development, challenges and potential. Begin with the outer journey, starting at ‘Grow’ and moving around the circles clockwise. Read the questions on the grey sticky notes, and replace them with sticky notes of your answers to these questions.
Stick with the outer journey for as long as you are making good progress. Feel free to change your sticky notes as new insights occur. If you continue to make good progress, it may be time to take on a challenge more worthy of your potential.
When progress on the outer journey stalls or falters, step down into the inner journey, again following your way round clockwise, starting with ‘Habits’ and again replacing the grey questions with your answers on sticky-notes. Use the insights of each box to help you rethink your answers to neighbouring boxes. Feel free to move between the inner and the outer journey in this regard.

Helpful questions to explore

Picture of self-coaching template annotated with key questions

 

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